Hans-Jochen (Team OS/2) - 2:2400/116

Paul Muad'dib's Rightous Rules of OS/2 Usage

For if thou dost wish an effective computing environment, verily OS/2
can offer such a space, but be advised that whiners, and losers, and
techno-wimps it likes Not.  And if you are so evenly derived from such a
stock, may you find comfort in the likes of Windoze or GEM or System 6
(7 is a holy number and it too would tax your meager mental resources).

But if you have a spirit of cunning, adventure, and guile (and better
yet a direct Internet feed :), then doth it well appear that OS/2 is
devised for you...  IF you know these few rules:

Thou shalt read the manuals, and re-read them, BEFORE installing the
system, else thy system ends up fit for a wretch.  For I have seen the
effects of the computer handyman who thinketh that manuals are for vasty
minds, and this very person had but 4 megs of system memory when he
concieved it a fine idea to make his hard drive one HPFS partition...and
the resultant disk thrashing was most lamentable to behold!

...which remindeth me of the next law, which is:  While HPFS is a most
absolute and excellent technology, and I can fairly proclaim its many
virtues, the Day of HPFS has not yet come.  Many programs understand it
not; if (pity) your OS gets churned about, you will have a most piteous
time accessing and repairing the damage, unless you are Smart.  And
unless you have had many vital experiences with OS/2, you are Not Smart.

Thou shalt read, re-read, and re-re-re-read the OS/2 FAQ (Frequently
Asked Questions list); for its own author is as fair a gentleman as any,
bearing the Name Timothy Sipples; he is most certainly Smart.  It seems
I have asked all but nine-and-ninety questions, only to be told,
"Insolent Wretch! Pollute our fair newsgroup no more with such tripe! It
is to be found in the FAQ! Now, get you gone, you minimus of hindering
knot-grass made...you bead, you acorn! Out, tawny Tarter, out! Out,
loathed medicine, hated potion, hence!" Oh, shame and eternal shame,
nothing but shame! I would save you from such a fate:  read the FAQ!

Thou shalt edit the garbage out of the installation procedure, for while
Neko the Cat may seem a fine idea upon installation, and you may say
often "Oh, to be such a fair young feline! To bound about the desktop
which such abandon, winding up days with toil and nights with sleep...To
fall famished with such a Charming and Humorous Aspect...oh, 'tis so
cute! I think I should laugh! Ha! Ho! Ha! Charming Cat! Ha!".  But as
the ever growing swapfile sucks upon your disk space, the fair young cat
(and programs of its ilk) shall assume a different visage, and your Good
Humor shall be replaced by a murderous rage, and you will find yourself
saying "Most foul and evil beast! I hate you! You tread upon my screen
with your vile whiskers, sucking up my precious hard drive space,
drinking my megabytes away; Oh, if I could but crawl inside the desktop
to join you in fair battle! But nay, you hide behind my windows and put
your .DLL's where I can't find them! Vile thing! I am angry now!

Know fairly that there are two files that can be created in the root.
These be Named autoexec.bat and startup.cmd; and if you place items in
these, they affect startup not, but rather every instance of DOS or OS/2
command lines that you open from inside the Workplace shell.  So:  if,
for instance, you desire a 50 line DOS every time you open a DOS
session, you can place "MODE CO80,50" in the autoexec.bat file, along
with other goodies such as DOSKEY and suchforth.

Know finally that the Workplace shell is far and away the most
underrated of OS/2 features, and the good man shall endeavor to know of
its Mysteries, and understand Objects and Shadows fully; for many
wonderful things are possible once a basic understanding of this is
achieved.

*EOF(MUAD_DIB.TXT)
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