Pete Norloff - OS/2 Shareware BBS - 1:109/347

DOS:  everybody pushes it till it glides, jumps on, and lets it coast
    till it skids....then jumps off, pushes, jumps back on, etc.

DOS w/QEMM:  same as DOS but with more leg room to push.

MAC:  all the stewards, stewardesses, captains, baggage handlers,
    etc., look the same, act the same, and talk the same.  Every time
    you ask questions about details you are told you don't need to
    know, don't want to know, and everything will be done for you
    without knowing, so just shut up.

OS/2:  to get on board you have to have your ticket stamped 10
    different times by standing in 10 different lines; then you have
    to fill out a form that states how you want your seating
    arrangement to be - whether it should have the look and feel of an
    ocean liner, a passenger train, or a bus.  If you are successful
    in getting on board and getting off the ground you have a
    wonderful, enjoyable trip - except for times when the rudder and
    flaps freeze stuck, in which case you have time to say your
    prayers and get your personal things in order before you crash.

Windows:  nice colorful airport terminal, friendly stewards/
    stewardesses, easy access to a plane, uneventful takeoff....then,
    BOOM!  - you blow up without any warning whatsoever.

NT:  everyone sits on the runway and forms the outline of a plane,
    then they just sit there and go "PHHLLZZZSST" like they're flying.

Unix:  everyone brings one piece of the plane with them when they come
    to the airport.  Then they go out on the runway and piece it
    together, all the time arguing about what kind of plane they are
    building.

Next:  A few passengers are riding comfortably along in a plane shaped
    like a large black cube, when suddenly the plane disappears, and
    they are told that their tickets will might still work with other
    airlines' planes, (as long as the airlines have signed a contract
    with Next), but that there might be a slight delay until all the
    details are worked out.

*EOF(AIRPORTS.TXT)
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